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Christina Hempstead

Challenges of Transitioning to School in the Fall

August 20, 2020 by Christina Hempstead

This upcoming fall will be like no other for America’s children. As schools struggle to decide how to re-open safely, upheaval in classroom routines will affect every child, and most notably children with disabilities.

Even at schools that return to full in-class education, for most, the new landscape will include distancing measures including; masks, constant sanitizing, curtailed extra-curricular activities and other safety precautions. Teachers, more susceptible to Covid-19 than children, may be in short supply as they make decisions about the safety of their families and themselves.

The salutary effects of returning to the classroom will accrue across multiple dimensions. As the spring vividly illustrated, children learn demonstrably better in school than at home, an estimated 30% difference in reading and 50% in math, according to the North West Education Association. For children with disabilities, the return of therapists, mental health support and individualized education could be a boon to their progress.

Additionally, children appear to be at significantly lower risk of Covid-19 illness in school than the general population has been in its conventional daily activities. Twenty-two European countries have reopened school, albeit with the usual precautions, and not a single Covid hotspot has been reported. It is estimated that an infected child has a 1 in 100,000 chance of dying from Covid, about one-twentieth the morbidity rate of adults. (This is not to advocate for complacency; the odds are less sanguine for immunocompromised children.)

The American Academy of Pediatrics strongly supports a return to the classroom for educational, social-emotional and developmental reasons. The organization argues that children suffer in unseen ways when school is closed and moved online; they grow from interacting socially with other children and adults besides their parents, eating nutritious meals in communal settings and playing outside with peers.

Some schools are considering the pod approach where each class remains together throughout the school day. This eliminates the between-class hallway jam and mixed playground activities  that are conducive to spreading infection. If one child tests positive for Covid under this arrangement, only that pod would require quarantining.

The Centers for Disease Control and Prevention recommends that students should be kept in small cohorts, mimicking most elementary school arrangements. CDC recommends this be adopted by middle and high schools as well.

This new arrangement brings with it considerable changes and impact for students and teachers alike. The pod system is structured so that one teacher remains with a pod of 6-15 children all day in one classroom, eating meals and conducting all learning in the same environment. This impacts the delivery of specialist classes such as music, physical education, and other such classes. It also limits who the students interact with daily meaning that the opportunities for meeting new friends and mixing with other kids on the playground is eliminated. The social distancing requirements also mean that teachers cannot touch or physically comfort students- a significant adjustment for younger children starting school for the first time whose connection to their first teacher is critical for safety, well-being and adjustment.

“Districts should expect a longer transition period for some students with disabilities,” says District Administration, a resource for school administrators. Missing out on specialized instruction and school-based services, in addition to interruptions in routines, may pose challenges for these students. The American Academy of Pediatrics recommends schools review the specific needs of each child with an IEP prior to their return to school.

Each state is crafting its own reconvening formulas based on CDC guidelines. That said, schools and parents must recognize that younger children and some children with disabilities will be challenged to follow mask protocols or observe distancing rules. Administrators planning safety procedures for the school year must take this complicating factor into account.

The transition back to school may come with a transition of its own, if Covid-19 infections across the nation continue to spike or if they flare up at an individual school. That might necessitate a shutdown and reintroduction of virtual learning. Being buffeted from in-person to online repeatedly could wreak havoc on children and parents alike, particularly those stressed by changes in routine.

Some counties have already announced that schools will not re-open in the fall, causing some parents to enlist with home school organizations, hire their own teachers, or apply to private schools. Some parents have organized social activities with their own small “pod” of families, hiring camp counselors and sports instructors to provide instruction and social and physical activities.

Filed Under: Blog

Time Outside

July 24, 2020 by Christina Hempstead

It’s July, and we have all spent more than our fair share of time inside over the past four months. In this time of cautious re-opening and nicer weather everywhere, we are all enjoying the outdoors and appreciating it more than usual. By following the CDC guidelines to stay socially distant from others, wear masks when feasible, and wash our hands often, it can be safe to be out and about in nature. Let’s take a look at the benefits of getting our kids outside to enjoy some fresh air and sunshine, while considering ways to do so away from crowds. We need it more now than ever!

The Benefits: Stress reduction, improved attention, motor skills

A pandemic is a stressful time. Disrupting routines (not only school, but after-school activities, therapies, and playdates) has intensified existing anxiety issues for many kids, so it’s a good reminder that being outside and being in nature is a great stress reducer. Studies show that even small amounts of time in nature (10-20 minutes) can help alleviate stress and make us feel happier-1. Time outside decreases cortisol, the “stress hormone,” that plays a role in anxiety and depression. In one study, pediatricians actually prescribed nature visits to families, and saw a decrease in parental stress-2.

Too much exposure to electronics can exacerbate attentional issues; with school closed this spring, many children have had more access to electronics than they typically would. Spending time outdoors can improve attention and may even lessen the symptoms of ADHD, which many children with autism also exhibit. Research has consistently shown that exposure to nature can improve concentration and even help impulse control-3.

Many of our kids have not had in-person occupational therapy, physical therapy, sports activities, or physical education in months. Spending time outdoors can improve motor skills by motivating children to engage in more and different types of activities, ultimately supporting their motor development-4. To be clear, it is not a substitute for therapy needs, but playing outdoors can give children more opportunities to improve their strength and balance than staying inside.

In addition to the above health factors, the risk of contracting COVID-19 appears to be lower outside than in-5.


1 Meredith, G.R., Rakow, D.A., Eldermire, E.R.B., Madsen, C.G., Shelley, S.P., Sachs, N.A., (2020). Minimum time dose in nature to positively impact the mental health of college-aged students, and how to measure it: A scoping review. Frontiers in Psychology, 14.

2 Razani, N., Marshed, S, Kohn, M. A., Wells, N. M., Thompson, D., Alqassai, M., Agodi, A, Rutherford, G. W. Effect of park prescriptions with and without group visits to parks on stress reduction in low-income parents: SHINE randomized trial. PLOS ONE 13(2): e0192921.

3 Andrea Faber Taylor, Frances E. Ming Kuo. Could Exposure to Everyday Green Spaces Help Treat ADHD? Evidence from Children’s Play Settings. Applied Psychology: Health and Well-Being, 2011; DOI: 10.1111/j.1758-0854.2011.01052.x

4 Niemistö, D., Finni, T., Haapala, E.A., Cantell, M., Korhonen, E., Saakslahti, A., (2019). Environmental correlates of motor competence in children—The Skilled Kids study. International Journal of Environmental Research and Public Health, 16

5 https://www.nytimes.com/2020/07/03/well/live/coronavirus-spread-outdoors-party.html


NOW TURN OFF THE COMPUTER AND GO OUTSIDE! IDEAS ON HOW TO GET OUTDOORS SAFELY.

The benefits of spending time outside or being in nature do not require a specific activity or a lot of preparation. Just being outside can be the goal. Some parents have the energy and inclination to run around and play with their kids, but if you do not, or if you have to be working on your laptop, don’t let that stop you. Just getting out in the fresh air is enough – even if you are sitting down with an iced coffee and your work laptop and allowing the kids to explore and play. Here is some inspiration for your outdoor adventures, be they goal-oriented or simply a place to wander.

LOW-KEY IDEAS FOR GETTING OUT IN NATURE
THE REGULAR STOPS: PLAYGROUNDS, POOLS, AND BEACHES.

Obviously, there are the regular summer go-tos. The internet can help you find the least busy spots: town websites, Facebook groups, and twitter can give you real-time information on which spaces are empty enough to truly practice safe social distancing. For instance, you may find that certain beaches in your area are practically empty in the evenings or on cloudy days. Even though it’s not your typical beach-day, kids can dig in the sand, run, and explore. Some places may even have you register for a parking spot in advance, assuring you that it will not become overcrowded.

OPEN-AIR MUSEUMS

Collections displaying buildings, sculptures, airplanes, ships, and other artifacts outside are known as Open Air Museums. Many of these organizations are limiting crowds by requiring online reservations and taking other proper precautions, in addition to the fact that they are already naturally well-ventilated. Learn about World War II at the Palm Springs Air Museum in California. Explore the kid-friendly trails on the acres of outdoor space at the Fruitlands Museum in Harvard, Massachusetts, where a group of transcendentalists lived in the 1840’s, attempting to create a utopian community. Walk amongst log cabins and stores from the fur trade era at the Pioneer Park Historical Complex in Rhinelander, Wisconsin, or visit the Chesapeake Bay Maritime Museum in St. Michaels, Maryland, which houses the world’s largest collection of Chesapeake Bay boats. Before jumping in your car, be sure to check online to see if reservations are required.

FORESTS AND FIELDS

This can be a go-to for working parents who need an outing with zero prep-time. There are plenty of outdoor spaces that don’t have playgrounds, water features, or any other bells and whistles, and so aren’t typical destinations. Nevertheless, where there are sticks, rocks, bugs, and dirt, most kids will find something to explore. The fact that there isn’t a featured element like a playground or a splash park keeps the crowds away, but there is just as much sun and fresh air as anywhere else. Working parents can take a lawn chair and a hotspot and work under a tree while kids explore nature or even play with their favorite indoor toys while getting a Vitamin D bath.

SUNSHINE IN YOUR OWN BACK YARD

For families in areas where outdoor spaces are largely closed, or parents who don’t want to risk going into public outdoor spaces at all, simply spending time in their own backyard or garden is enough to connect with nature and reap some benefits. No access to a backyard or garden? Planting flowers or growing vegetable seeds on a porch or a windowsill with your kids still puts you all in the sunshine and may even bring in some interesting six-legged wildlife. And one study, conducted last year by the Detroit Zoological Society and Michigan State University, showed that even viewing animals on a screen might decrease stress.

For those of us who have been on electronics overload, having binge-watched every show on Netflix and allowed our kids to get lost in the worlds of Minecraft, Roblox, and other video games, the ability to go out again is more than welcome. Following the guidelines to keep a safe distance between non-household members, wearing masks when necessary, and washing hands frequently keeps being outdoors a healthy way to relieve stress and anxiety. We all feel a little better when we increase our physical activity, and get a little change of scenery, so put down your device and go spend some valuable time in the fresh air.

LEARN ABOUT GOING OUT SAFELY:

https://www.cdc.gov/coronavirus/2019-ncov/daily-life-coping/going-out.html?CDC_AA_refVal=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.cdc.gov%2Fcoronavirus%2F2019-ncov%2Fdaily-life-coping%2Factivities.html

Filed Under: Blog

Keep Your Child with Autism Engaged This Summer

July 17, 2020 by Christina Hempstead

Parents of special needs children worldwide are struggling with the prospect of engaging the minds and bodies of their children through the ongoing summer of Covid-19.

For children with autism, routines and predictability are critical, threatened by the inexplicable disruption of closed schools and camps, and curtailed social outlets. Although some families are utilizing in-person and virtual services, for many, professional support has declined dramatically or evaporated entirely while the needs of children with autism remain the same.

So what are things we can do to make best use of this time?
With summer weather there are more opportunities to engage children in a variety of indoor and outdoor activities that ignite their imaginations and keep their bodies moving. But first, it is important to speak with children about the current situation in a way that helps them understand why their world has been transformed. Social stories and comic book conversations can help explain current circumstances.

Maintaining a routine is vitally important for children with autism. Meal, nap and play times should remain sacrosanct even as the activities within play time vary. Keeping an autistic child engaged around the clock amid today’s restrictions is going to take some imagination; here is a framework to help, which also allows for maintaining social distancing:

Exploit the good weather and get outside
  1. Camp in the backyard. Teach your child how to put up a tent, cook outside and have a sleepover in your backyard or living room.

  2. Use colored chalk to draw on the sidewalk.

  3. Paint your fence. Use water if it is not in need of a new coat.

  4. Visit a local pond. Feed the ducks. Race paper boats.

  5. Hike in the woods. Talk about the different trees, plants, and animals you see and hear.

  6. Learn about geocaching and go in search of caches. Visit geocaching.com for information and download an app.

  7. Blow bubbles

Employ learning activities disguised as fun
  1. Develop a secret code and write a letter to a friend using it.

  2. Cook or bake together. Teach your child about measuring and following directions.

  3. Play school and make your child the teacher. Ask them to teach you something they have learned.

  4. Pick a favorite animal and read about it online. Create a fact sheet and draw a picture of the animal.

  5. Make healthy snacks together and talk about what makes them healthy.

Engage in tactile activities
  1. Go to a playground and play in the sand, on the swing and on the see-saw (many playgrounds are re-opening now with specific procedures in place for social distancing and disinfection).

  2. Make slime or modeling dough using online recipes.

  3. Spread shaving cream on a cookie sheet and draw in it.

  4. String macaroni or beads.

  5. Finger paint. Ask your child to spell out words.

  6. Build contraptions with Legos.

Explore the world online
  1. Visit a zoo, aquarium or museum. They are easy to find online. Here is the Montreal Science Centre.

  2. Visit an online learning site like Scholastic. There are literally dozens of them.

  3. Visit five spectacular National Parks – Kenai Fjords in Alaska, Hawaii Volcanos, Carlsbad Caverns in New Mexico, Bryce Canyon in Utah and Dry Tortugas in Florida. Or take a trip to Mars.

  4. Use a video conference platform to visit with a friend or therapist.

Be intentional about screen time and avoid using it as an anesthetic. An overload of screen time, including television, is associated with hyperactivity, difficulty sleeping and irritability.

Disruptions in the daily lives of children with autism caused by the novel coronavirus present significant challenges to parents. Innumerable resources exist online to keep children engaged physically and cognitively. For more ideas, visit https://www.autismspeaks.org/virtual-summer-activities.

Filed Under: Blog

How to Start Talking About Racism

June 25, 2020 by Christina Hempstead

By: Angela Montes, MS, BCBA

 

Racism. Its existence makes our hearts heavy, evokes sadness, generates uncertainty, and creates fear. Starting and having a conversation about racism has always been difficult. Even though it may make us uncomfortable, it’s an important conversation to have. As parents and caregivers, you may find yourself asking: How old does my child need to be to have this conversation? How do I even start the conversation? Are there any resources that will help me with this conversation? Here are some starting points, using some of the tools you might already have, to initiate a conversation about racism.

 

Ages 0-2:

It is recommended that children see their parents and caregiver interact with individuals whose race and ethnicity differ from their own. Take it a step further and enrich your environment to ensure that your child is exposed to books and toys that include multiple ethnicities. According to studies (Kelly, D.J., et al. 2005), children as young as three months old can categorize people by race. Early intervention is critical.

 

Children’s Books about Diversity

 

Ages 3-4:

Between this age, parents should continue to model inclusivity of other ethnicities via physical interactions, TV shows, books read, and toys purchased. Children who see their parents and caregivers engage in unbiased behavior benefit from the positive model they observe. As a proactive strategy, initiate the conversation of racism with your child by pointing out the differences in color of skin, hair, and language. It is important to show young children that differences exist and that it’s okay to be different.

 

10 Tips for Reading Picture Books with Children through a Race-Conscious Lens

 

Ages 5-11:

Between this age range, children are making stronger associations across racial groups. Continue the exposure of multiple ethnicities via books, TV shows, and interactions. Initiate a discussion about the subtleties within TV shows and how stereotypes often carry over into the real world. Begin to discuss how racism has created an unfair treatment of people of different

races. Continue the conversation that this issue has been ongoing and that they can help support the fight against racism through advocacy groups. Having direct conversations during this age can help improve racial attitudes. As a proactive strategy, parents and caregivers can begin conversations about racism early and not wait until their child is exposed to a racist event.

 

CNN/Sesame Street racism town hall

 

Ages 12 and up:

Keep the conversation going! During this time, continue to model interactions with other ethnicities, diversity within books, games, and TV shows. Remain open in dialogue, including answering questions children have about racism (even if it’s uncomfortable for you). These direct conversations promote inclusion and that it’s okay to discuss racism within your family structure. In doing so, you are providing different perspectives for your children. Teach your children how to recognize racism and how to respond to situations they may encounter. For example, you can equip your child with statements to use, such as “I don’t agree with you,” or “that wasn’t cool – because…” Additionally, ensure your child knows whom they can approach to report and discuss what they experienced. Using age-appropriate language, ensure that children also have the skill of self-awareness regarding race. From evaluation, that is your starting point to begin to educate your children on what race is and what it isn’t.

 

How to Talk to Your Kids About Anti-Racism: A List of Resources

 

Resources
Studies on the topic of race

 

https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC2566511/

(Kelly, D. J., Quinn, P. C., Slater, A. M., Lee, K., Gibson, A.,

Smith, M., Ge, L., & Pascalis, O. (2005). Three-month-olds,

but not newborns, prefer own-race faces. Developmental

science, 8(6), F31–F36.

 

https://doi.org/10.1111/j.1467-7687.2005.0434a.x

 

https://www.academia.edu/3094721/Children_Are_Not_Colorblind_How_Young_Children_Learn_Race

 

 

Tools on How-To regarding racism

 

https://themighty.com/2015/04/what-to-do-when-kids-pointat-someone-in-public/

 

https://www.childrenscommunityschool.org/social-justiceresources/

 

https://centerracialjustice.org/resources/resources-fortalking-about-race-racism-and-racialized-violence-withkids/

 

https://www.embracerace.org/resources/10-tips-forreading-picture-books-with-children-through-a-raceconscious-lens

 

 

Resources to expand your library

 

https://akidsbookabout.com/

 

https://hereweeread.com/

 

https://bilingualkidspot.com/2019/05/13/diversity-booksfor-children

 

https://www.mylittlemoppet.com/books-about-diversityand-tolerance-for-young-kids/

Filed Under: Blog

Preparing to Use Respite Workers and Babysitters

June 22, 2020 by Christina Hempstead

Now that things are beginning to open back up in some communities, we may start to turn our thoughts to one of the luxuries that may have been unavailable to many of us for the past few months – babysitters! Particularly now, as many of us have been with our children for months, the thought of getting out and enjoying some adult time is especially appealing. And for some of us, it’s a matter of mental well-being. (Insert “raising hand” emoji!)

Before the pandemic, I was much more hesitant to leave my kids with someone who didn’t have a comprehensive working knowledge of my child’s needs. Many parents are finding that their regular babysitter or respite worker is no longer available, or is not yet ready to go into someone else’s home. If you are in the situation of hiring someone new to care for your kiddos, here are some tips to getting back in the babysitter / respite worker game:

Preparation and Planning

Leaving your children after such a long stretch of being together may be unnerving to you – and to them. Carefully consider what you need to do to make this successful – picking the time of day they may be happiest, avoiding leaving during difficult parts of their schedule (in our house, that’s bedtime), and listing the types of activities that are sure to keep them engaged and content (cough-electronics-cough). Being in the midst of a pandemic that seems to be more easily spread indoors than out, you may want to think about having everyone outside for a portion or all of the time the sitter or respite worker is there.

Interview – Be Honest About the Job 

If you are using a babysitter or respite worker you haven’t worked with before, be sure to disclose everything they need to know in order to determine if they are the right fit. Sometimes this part is easy to skip, because the most important pieces are also the parts that are most painful to talk about. Lead with all of the positives about your kiddos, but don’t forget to mention the hard parts – any toileting issues, aggression or other challenging behavior they may need to handle. It’s also extremely important to be crystal clear about the COVID precautions you expect them to take, and what you will be doing to protect them (masks, gloves, handwashing, disinfecting). Some parents will feel more comfortable inquiring about the new babysitter’s social distancing practices, and it’s important to clarify that ANY symptoms that arise requires a cancellation.

Virtual Orientation 

Before the pandemic, many of us would have a new babysitter or respite worker come over and get to know the kids on a day we’d all be together, or at the very least, have them come by early to get the lay of the land. These days, as we focus on preventing the spread of germs, you may want to have a “virtual” orientation to accomplish this. Though you may still want to spend some time with the new babysitter and your kids in person before you leave, getting through talks of where the emergency numbers are and how to handle challenging behavior is easily something you can accomplish via phone or Zoom.

Behavior Plan Cheat Sheet

If your child has a behavior plan for ABA sessions or in school, it’s a good idea to have a short-hand version for the babysitter or respite worker. There’s no need to give them the whole thing, but it’s a good idea to write down the pieces of it that you expect them to keep consistent. Respite workers may be more adept at implementing behavior plans than your typical babysitter, so adjust according to their experience and role.

Arrange the Environment 

If your house is anything like mine, there are toys and other items around that are more likely to cause issues than others. Maybe there are toys your children fight over, or things they need a lot of supervision to use, or non-food items that could end up in someone’s mouth. Do a scan of your house, and put away anything likely to cause an issue.

Prepare the Kid(s)

Every child needs a different type of preparation. It is helpful for some children to have a social story, especially if they haven’t been separated from their parents in a few months. It can also be comforting to others to have a “warming up” period while they get to know the new person in their parents’ presence. I know other moms who prefer to keep the transition short and sweet and “rip off the band-aid” by heading out immediately. You know your kid, consider what will work best and be intentional about how you approach this.

Once your area is safe and you are ready to leave your kids, planning ahead (even just a little bit) can do wonders for your ability to relax. Go enjoy your foray back into the world.

Please note: Different states are in different points in re-opening; this is not an endorsement to get a babysitter if that runs counter to the guidance in your area. 

Filed Under: Blog

A Letter From LEARN’s President

June 5, 2020 by Christina Hempstead

Over the last 10 weeks, I know that most of us have experienced some level of fear, sadness, uncertainty, and hardship as the pandemic has swept across the country and changed almost every facet of American living. For many of us, these feelings have been compounded in recent days with sorrow, anger, and confusion as civil unrest has forced us to look hard at the inequities in American society. Especially to members of the Black community that we work with and serve, I send my personal support and empathy, and I want to be clear that we stand in support of the rights, safety and dignity of all people.

As an organization, it’s periods like these that force us to think deeply about our role in creating a brighter future in the communities we serve. Inherent in our mission is the idea that we exist to help children succeed. But now more than ever, it’s important to take stock of who we help and how we do it. I believe strongly that:

  • Our mission is to deliver as much hope as we can, to as many families as we can, equally and fairly within all the communities we serve.
  • We have a duty to serve all families with compassion, respect and understanding of their circumstances.
  • While society as a whole may not be a level playing field, we must do better to create a workplace that is inviting, and model inclusion and diversity.

So what’s next?

  1. We will be re-evaluating how we train and support the clinical competency of our clinical and administrative team to ensure that our services are compassionate for all
  2. We will be tasking our Diversity & Inclusion Committee with generating new ideas on how we can better promote a diverse and inclusive workplace
  3. We will continue to proactively seek to expand our services to underserved communities in need

Every step forward counts, and if we can make small progress every day towards our ideals, we can deliver results that will continue to make us proud to work for LEARN as we do our part to contribute to a brighter future for all.

#togetherwecan

-Justin

Filed Under: Blog

Keeping Kids Connected to Loved Ones Via Zoom and FaceTime

May 29, 2020 by Christina Hempstead

As some states cautiously move into the initial phases of re-opening, there may be more places to go within your community, and more opportunities to see people you haven’t been with for some time.  Even so, it’s likely there are people in your child’s life that you are still unable to see, whether it is because they are higher-risk individuals who are self-isolating or because travel between states has not yet fully resumed.  We are moving in to our fourth month of diminished contact with our loved ones, and as ever, looking for ways to keep up connections with those who are in our hearts, even when they can’t be in our homes.

Our children, too, have felt the isolation.  We want to make sure that our children continue to maintain important relationships with family members and friends they’re not able to see in person.  When your child has autism, this can be even more of a challenge.  As we continue down this road of reduced in-person contact, it’s important to help our children preserve their ties with others.  Video conferencing, such as Zoom or Skype, can be one way to keep these bonds strong.

Maintaining a wide network of support for our children within our communities is another reason to stay connected.  Even if relating to others is difficult or connecting via video conferencing isn’t particularly meaningful for your child, it can serve to keep your child at the forefront of the thoughts of others.  Helping your child’s community to keep them in mind, make regular contact, and show their love and support can have long-term benefits on both sides of the relationship.

Here are some tips to help make video-conferencing with family members a little more successful:

Expectations

To reduce stress on yourself as the mediator, shortly before the call, take a minute to remind yourself that the most important goal is for the two parties to quickly connect and know they still care.  Let go of any expectations that there will be a sustained interaction.

Prepare for a zoom session just long enough to allow everyone to say hello, and have a brief connection; too long of a session may put stress on you, your child, or the person on the other end.  Unless your child is an avid zoomer and the person on the other end is dying for a long session, you will want to plan for a fairly short call.  Really, just a few minutes on a regular basis is enough to spark recognition and rekindle the sense of connection that your child has with this person.

Your child may be at the point where they don’t yet have a spark of connection with very many people, and that’s ok.  It’s still important to maintain familiarity.  Remember that setting up short but frequent interactions with other people in your community can also strengthen the rapport that the other person feels for your child, which may boost opportunities for further social interaction in the future.

Preparation

To improve the chances of a smooth experience, you may want to prepare your child, and perhaps prepare the other party.

Choose one or two things to talk or items to show the person.   Children can present a favorite toy, or art project that they have done.  If your child is verbal, you might review something they’ve done recently that they can share, practice a song they can sing, or prepare them to tell a favorite joke.  If there is a new skill that your child has that s/he is particularly proud of, this is a great time to show off.  If your child may be tough to engage via video, you might consider showing the other person an interaction between you and your child, for instance, a game you play together, or something you do that boosts your child’s mood.

Some of the people you may be connecting your child with already know them well and will have excellent ideas about how to engage.  Others, especially older relatives, might not be familiar or comfortable with video conferencing, and may have difficulty coming up with ideas, so it can also be useful to prepare them.

Think about things that will be most likely to catch your child’s attention.  If your child likes music, for instance, zoom friends can sing them a song, play an instrument for them, or play a song that they could listen to together.  If your child is interested in electronics or visual stimuli, the zoom partner could use a custom background that might be particularly interesting to your kiddo, share their screen to look at photos together, or use effects on the screen to share stickers and drawings.  For children who are more verbal, you might prepare their zoom partner to tell them a joke or a story, or give them a softball question to ask your child about something they will be excited to share.  If your child likes books, reading a story is another great option.

The Call

During the call, let go of the expectations that your preparation will go exactly as planned, and return your focus to the underlying goal:  a short hello to maintain a link to an important person.  Remember that it doesn’t have to be a long, chatty affair, it can be a 5-min operation start to finish.  Give it your best effort to help your child attend, but don’t put pressure on them to sustain the interaction longer than they are interested.  Go in with an attitude of flexibility – do what works, let go of what doesn’t.

Keep in mind that each conversation is just one small interaction that continues to build upon their history of rapport. Short, frequent contacts with others can help your child continue to recognize and identify those they are not seeing frequently, and can support the ongoing relationship.  Put in the preparation and keep the interaction short and sweet.  And of course, if you don’t feel successful the first time around, remember that practice makes progress, and keep on going.

Filed Under: Blog

To All the Other Parents of Children With Special Needs: I Feel You

May 21, 2020 by Christina Hempstead

This was a text from one of my mom-friends in the early days of our stay-at-home order.  It took me a second to register the meaning in this statement from someone who is my friend, my peer, who has children of the same age.  It felt so foreign, and I immediately thought, Time?!  What am I doing wrong?  (The answer is, of course, plenty, but let’s not get distracted here.)

The difference between my lovely (bored) friend and myself is that I am parenting a child with special needs.  I don’t have a child with autism; my oldest struggles with mental illness.  In regular times, it’s lonely, it’s difficult, and I feel like our family is indelibly different.  But in the midst of a pandemic…  Forget different, we are alien life forms on a different planet.  I get texts from my friends asking for validation that it is okay that they let their child skip an assignment today.   My first thought is, Girl, today I turned on closed captioning while the kids watched tv and I called it Reading All Day.  Facebook is full of pictures of the cleaned-out basements and fresh-baked sourdough done in my friends’ free time.  Again: Free time?!?  Like some of my friends who have kids with autism, my days are spent helping my child manage the basics of life: getting over the emotional hurdle of breakfast, running the marathon of 2 hours of home-schooling that feels like 12, spending an hour out of every three diffusing a meltdown.  Throughout it all, my husband and I are following a path that winds around the house like a trail of breadcrumbs, wiping and fixing the things that have been spilled and broken in his wake.  It is constant.  It is relentless.  There is no lunch break.  There is definitely no time to be cleaning out my basement.

I want to take a moment to share my awe of all single parents. The only reason I am able to still function at work is because of my husband’s support and participation.  (Seriously, single parents, I salute you and offer up all the hugs, kudos, props, and every other form of recognition.  If you are a single parent caring for a child with special needs during this pandemic, with all of the powers vested in me by the Mommy-Blogger-Gods, I decree that in your next life, you deserve to be lounging on a shady terrace in a tropical climate, being slowly fanned, while you sip a fruity drink with flowers in it.)  I do have a partner, so yes, there are moments when I can take a walk by myself, or shut myself in my room for a half hour.  But even this privilege feels trivial under the constant barrage of the immediate needs of my child.

So here’s what I want to say to my peeps out there, the parents who are following similar bread-crumb trails of disaster around their houses:

You know your kid. 

Some of us have chosen to have service providers in our homes, accepting the risks; some of us have moved to telehealth, but with fewer hours; some of us have had to discontinue services, for one or more of a million reasons.  These decisions impact our child and our families now, and in one way or another, their future.  More than ever before, we are in our heads, second-guessing the decisions we are making about our children’s services, or about how we are handling their days (too much routine, not enough routine).  Even the opinions of well-meaning friends and relatives who are not trying to be judgmental can seep in and sow seeds of doubt.  Here is a mantra to repeat to yourself: I know my kid better than anyone.  You are the only one in a position to know what is best for your child.  It’s important to listen to the opinions of some (professionals who know your child, for instance) and to absolutely ignore others (your nosey neighbor who’s “just seeing if everything is okay” when your kid is raging over, literally, spilled milk).  Remind yourself frequently that you are the expert on your kid; not only that, you’re also the one directly managing the day-to-day every day.  Whatever decision you have made, I applaud you.

You are doing great, and I am not judging you.

Thou shalt not judge oneself by thy neighbor’s Instagram.  For reals.  Reading heartwarming stories about all of your friends’ kids’ accomplishments and seeing portrait-mode-perfect pictures of their happy faces while doing a distance-learning science project can stop my heart for a moment.  This stuff is hard for me in normal times; somehow this pain has been heightened by the pandemic.  If you can find it within you to see these things and be happy for your friends and also still feel good about your own family: you are a special angel and I want you in my life.  For the rest of us: turn off the Instagram and the Facebook and find communities of parents who understand your story and can celebrate the unique joys of your kiddo with you.  I could never tell my typical-mom friends about how thrilled I am to go two days in a row without a hole knocked in the wall, but I have found other moms who have similar circumstances and can help me rejoice in this little bit of progress, which reminds me that I am doing great.  You are doing your best AND your best is enough.  Recognize this and seek out others who will also appreciate your kiddo, your circumstances, and your efforts. Repeat to yourself, you’re doing a great job.

 

Ask for Help. 

I know, it’s harder than ever to get help.  Babysitters may be less available, or you may have less money to pay them.  Home therapists and respite workers were hard to find before the pandemic, and now it’s…well, let’s just not even go there.  Here are some ways to ask for help if you are drowning:

  1. If you do have a partner, I highly recommend locking yourself in your room once a day and tuning the world out, with headphones, a book, television, or a nap. Nobody can keep going without a break.
  2. If your child is able to FaceTime independently, reach out to friends and family members and schedule a FaceTime session every day, whereby you can get a small break. (Hooray!  Congrats!  You get to go to the bathroom alone!  Oh, unless you have multiple kids.)
  3. If you have an ABA therapist, keep them updated on how things are going. Don’t hesitate to communicate when something new has arisen or gotten worse – they are there to help you.  If you need more hours, ask for it.
  4. If you don’t have ABA services right now, reach out to see if telehealth is available to you, even if it’s just parent education.
  5. If your state has a crisis intervention hotline, put the number in your phone so you have it handy if you need it.
  6. Exhausted parents don’t love to cook dinner….if you can afford it, order take-out. If you have a friend that offers to help, ask for a dinner drop-off.  If you have cereal and toast for dinner every night for a week, I feel you, friend.
  7. If you need a group of people who get you, turn to Reddit, or FB groups, or another online forum of parents who share your situation. Lurk for awhile, or jump right in.  Hearing someone else tell a story that could be yours honestly lightens the load for a minute.
  8. If you are associated with a church, temple, or other community organization, reach out to see what services they are offering their members. I have heard of organizations providing meals, support phone calls, grocery drop-off, and other help.
  9. Everyone should know about Aunt Bertha – it’s a network linking up non-profits and social programs with people who need them. If you need help with paying for groceries, healthcare, housing, utilities, or help finding a job or getting legal aid, Aunt Bertha’s got you.  https://www.auntbertha.com/
  10. The National Domestic Violence Hotline is available 24/7 and is free and confidential. I hope you don’t need it, but if you do, please don’t hesitate to call: 1-800-799-SAFE (7233).
  11. The Disaster Distress helpline is set up to help people experiencing a crisis, such as this pandemic. Call 1-800-985-5990 or text TalkWithUs to 66746.
  12. If you don’t already have a counselor and you feel you need one, ask your PCP for a referral.
  13. Check to see if your employer has an Employee Assistance Program. They may offer free counseling, legal advice, or other services.
  14. If you are in fear for your own safety or the safety of others, please call 911.

Take care of yourself, by any means possible. 

Caregiver Burnout is real, y’all.  I had a dark day last week – I was exhausted by a few really tumultuous days in a row, with no sleep.  Someone mentioned “self care” to me and I made a gesture.  For the sake of decorum, let’s say I rolled my eyes.  I would have loved to have taken a bubble bath, gone to get a mani-pedi, spend an hour in yogic meditation, had lunch by myself while I read a book, and all of the other things that come to mind when I hear the words “self-care.”  It goes without saying that none of these things are an option at the moment, and not just because my mani-pedi place is closed.  But here’s the thing: we still have to take care of ourselves.  The best way that I’ve found to “care for myself” at this point in time is to simply lower the bar.  Your bar is already low, you say?  Maybe you need some more encouragement.

It is okay to decide not to change from your sleeping sweatpants to your daytime sweatpants.

It is okay to not respond to texts for several weeks and then to forget to show up to a zoom social hour with your friends.  It happened, don’t sweat it.  They’ll live.

It is okay to change the screen-time rule to only-when-they’re-awake.

It is okay to let your child wear their favorite dirty shirt 14 days in a row if you are picking your battles and that’s not one you feel like waging.

It is okay to lock yourself in the bathroom with your headphone and pretend you are having digestive issues when you are really watching SNL at Home skits, because dammit you need to laugh!

Get the picture?  You need to rest, Fam.

 

You know what The Plague, the Spanish Flu of 1918, and the Hong Kong Flu Pandemic of 1968 all have in common?  They ended, eventually.  Like everything else in life, this pandemic is temporary.  Hold on to that.  Remind yourself that the reason it feels so hard is that we have been doing this for so long – which means we are that much closer to it being over.  Above everything else, while we continue to take this slog one day at a time, be kind to yourself.  Give yourself the kind of encouragement and compassion that you would give me, if we were friends….And I promise that I’ll do the same.

Filed Under: Blog

Teaching COVID-19 Skills

May 14, 2020 by Christina Hempstead

As states take their first tentative steps toward reopening, we want to support families navigating new rules that may be encountered in the outside world: hand hygiene, wearing masks, and physical distancing.  You may be considering sending your child back to a center-based program soon, or thinking about what things will look like at school in the fall; whatever the circumstance, these are health and safety issues that we should address with all of our children.  Here are some topics to discuss with your clinician.

Hand Hygiene

We know that the spread of Covid-19 is primarily through touch, so it is a good time to talk to your clinician about where your child is with hand hygiene, and what is the next step in teaching them to maintain hygienic hands.

Thorough hand washing is most likely something you have already begun to teach your child that will remain a priority.  For those who are just learning this skill, it is more important for them to tolerate a longer, prompted, handwashing than to achieve independence at a less-thorough level.  Children should also be able to use hand sanitizer effectively, cough and sneeze into their elbow, and be able to refrain from touching common surfaces and their own faces.

There are many different methods of teaching handwashing: prompting and reinforcing, chaining (teaching certain steps first and then adding on to the “chain”), video modeling, picture schedules, or peer (sibling) tutoring.  These same approaches can be slightly modified for teaching effective use of hand sanitizer.  Coughing and sneezing into an elbow may also be taught through modeling, video modeling, peer (sibling) tutoring, or repeated practice and role-play.

Another thing to think about is ways to help our kids build the habit of keeping their hands to themselves in public – we don’t want them touching items others have touched, or their own face.  The easiest method is  to teach them an alternative response, like keeping their hands in their pockets, clasping their hands together, or holding an object with both hands.  First, you use instructions and reinforcement to teach the target behavior to occupy their hands.  Then, begin to slowly increase the amount of time they can keep their hands occupied before they receive a reinforcer.  Ultimately, when they are in the community, you want to be able to give them the instruction and feel confident they will not touch common surfaces or their face.

Face Coverings

Masks and other face coverings will likely be in use for the foreseeable future, so it’s a good idea to begin teaching our kids to tolerate wearing face coverings and getting used to others wearing them.  One way to tackle this is “desensitization,” a fancy term for starting small and building up tolerance slowly.  If you were using desensitization, you might begin with first having your child touch the mask with her hand, then allowing the mask to be held up to her face, then allowing the ties to be secured for a second.  Another way is “pairing,” which would entail having a lot of reinforcers available when a mask is present, and getting your child to associate the mask with positive experiences.  Other topics to address with your clinician are whether it’s appropriate to teach your child to put a mask on him/herself, or learn how to take a mask off hygienically, without touching the front of the mask, and putting it directly into the laundry.

Physical Distancing

Another skill that will continue to be relevant is learning how to physically distance.  For children who can learn to give others 6 feet of distance, your clinician can modify techniques from social skills research that have been used to teach children personal space.  Many children will not be able to gauge 6 feet on their own, and the focus moves to ensuring they can follow instructions for their parents or caregivers to guide them in public.  You can begin by looking at the instructions that your child already responds to that may help you to guide him to physically distance, for example, “stop,” “come here,” “wait with me,” and “stand right there.”  It’s likely that your child has learned or worked on these or similar instructions in the past; now it becomes more important that they are able to follow them quickly and reliably.  Talk to your clinician about appropriate ways to solidify these responses, such as increasing the amount of reinforcement earned for physical distancing instructions, practicing them frequently in a variety of settings, and practicing them in the presence of significant distractions.

As parents and service providers, our goal is always to support children in staying healthy and safe as we guide their development. Though these specific goals may not be the things we would have expected to focus on, our aim is to stay flexible and continue to adapt (and help our children adapt) to the changing practices in our community.

Filed Under: Blog

Continuing Progress During COVID-19

May 7, 2020 by Christina Hempstead

By Dr. Hanna Rue and Justin Funches

COVID-19 has changed the daily life of most families in the United States. Many in the autism community are now faced with challenging decisions. Families must decide how they’ll continue their child’s therapy program. Should they increase or decrease therapy hours? Consider online therapy? Or just keep things the same?

This is a complex decision with no simple answer. Every loved one with autism has different needs and faces different challenges. Each family must consider their situation and determine what’s best for them when speaking with their Behavior Analyst.

When making these tough decisions, there are several important factors that each family should consider.

 

Intensity of Challenging Behaviors

There are families who face significant challenges due to their child displaying aggression, self-injury, elopement, or other dangerous behaviors. For these families, clinical support is critical to maintaining safety in the home. Families concerned about managing their child’s challenging behaviors have to compare the risks of COVID-19 to the safety risks posed by the challenging behavior. In these situations, when continuing services is a matter of safety, it’s important to work with your clinical team to ensure proper health and safety procedures are in place. LEARN has implemented successful practices including pre-session health risk assessments, frequent handwashing, thorough sanitization of workspaces, restricting parent/caregiver participation, and limiting the number of technicians in the home.

 

Household Dynamics

Families with high risk individuals in their home, such as elderly or immune-compromised family members, may decide to put home-based ABA services on hold or move to online therapy – which reduces the risk for vulnerable household members.

While ABA services in the home can be delivered safely through strict health and safety protocols – none of these strategies are fool-proof. The only way to fully social distance and receive ABA services is through online therapy via services such as teleABA. In households where the risk of having staff in the home is too great, continuing ABA therapy online helps to decrease the risk of COVID-19 exposure and allows therapy (and progress) to continue.

tel·e·aba

noun: teleABA;

The provision of ABA therapy via computer, tablet or smartphone.

“By starting teleABA services, the family was able to help maintain their child’s behaviors when they couldn’t access session in-person.”

 

Risk of Skill Loss and Behavior Regression

There are families who have witnessed significant improvement in their child’s communication and social skills. These families may determine that the benefits of continuing in-home ABA services are greater than risks of COVID-19 – which we minimize by working closely with a clinician and taking ALL recommended precautions per the CDC. Other factors such as location in the U.S. and access to reliable technology impact a family’s decision to continue home-based ABA services.

 

Opportunities for Additional Learning

While the widespread closures of schools and center-based programs has created a challenge for many families, it’s also created opportunities for additional learning opportunities. In some circumstances, children may benefit from increased intensity of services in the home. Whether that’s to support new skill acquisition or work on a behavior reduction program. This could be particularly relevant for young learners and older learners focused on learning life skills.

It is our hope that the considerations outlined above will help families determine the best path forward. There is no one-size-fits all but we will partner with you to determine how your family can continue to benefit from ABA therapy. Whether that means keeping things the same, changing the intensity of service or embracing teleABA, every family has the opportunity to get the support that fits their individual needs. We highly recommend that families don’t go too long without services and work with their BCBA to find a solution to their challenges, as well as stay up to date on community news and happenings.

Filed Under: Blog

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